[leicester city centre]

We've finally hit summer. It's great, I've got my shades on and my chill-out tunes blasting as I amble over to the bus stop. Going through town isn't always so picturesque but in summer somehow everything looks alive. So, I'm minding my business and notice this hefty Easter Enders-type geezer coming at me...with a clipboard? He stops me, I can hardly hear with my ear 'phones in and then I think, what the heck, it's summer, I'll take out the ear 'phones. Turns out he's collecting money (shows me his id badge and complains about it being an ugly photo) for kids. Sure, how much does he want...but before I get the amount he's got to make every racial/sexist slur in the book. First he notices my accent (duh!, I know I don't sound local). Where are you from pretty (that irks me!)...I debate in my head...should I walk away (but the poor kids) should I say Italy (but then my accent confuses people)...I'll say Canada...right. Then he starts telling me he thinks I'm from Iran...doesn't believe me, not Canadian. No wait India, that's where I'm from. But, not "them" natives from Canada..."them" who make curry! (can u believe this?). I shook my head, said it's not important where I'm from but that I'm just about still willing to make a donation...then he says he's only been stopping pretty girls today and only with a clipboard in hand can he actually meet women...yada yada yada. I just kept staring at him and asking him how much he actually wanted as a donation and then he started going on about Richard on Big Brother; "he's Canadian don't you know..." Nope, haven't been watching...then this guy collecting for the children starts telling me that Richard wouldn't be interested in me, he's one of "them gay homosexuals..." So, I gave him the £2 and got a receipt for the donation and walked off wondering if the sun had gone to his head...